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How to Build a Sexy BDSM Playroom in 5 Simple Steps

Lisa Welsh
Lisa Welsh

Sex & Pleasure Educator

If you’re a pleasure seeker like me, and your inner bedroom goddess is just begging to come out and play, then you’re probably more than open to the idea of building your own personalised Pleasure Nest that you and your lover can explore together. 

Do you want to have more sexual freedom? Be able to explore your inner desires in a designated space? And, most importantly, have MORE FUN with sex?  

I hear you, and I’ve got your back!

Whether you’re looking for a BDSM playroom or a romantic love nest, this article will give you the exact steps you can follow to build the perfect sex room to satisfy all your deepest desires.

What is a BDSM playroom?

In light of the famous “How to Build a Sex Room” show recently aired on Netflix, people from around the world are curious to know how they can also build their own BDSM rooms.

Depending on the couple’s needs and preferences, a BDSM room or sex dungeon can take many forms. It’s a room designated specifically for BDSM play and can often be found in basements. 

However, some people also transform their bedrooms, spare rooms, or large walk-in closets into these pleasure-inducing spaces. 

Inside these rooms, you can explore your deepest fantasies, including, but not limited to: 

  • Spanking
  • Flogging
  • Resistance play
  • Bondage
  • Suspension
  • Roleplay
  • Sex toy exploration
  • And much more 

These spaces are usually stocked with sex toys and BDSM equipment and often have different areas for various sex-related activities. 

Intrigued? Well, read on to see how YOU can build your very own BDSM space. 

Steps to build a BDSM room

Here’s how you can create your very own love den or BDSM dungeon in five simple steps: 

1. Pick the ideal space

Before we get to the exciting stuff, you first need to find a space in your home that works well as a sex room. Attics, cellars, spare bedrooms, and basements are all excellent choices. 

That being said, for you to be able to transform the room into the kinky space of your dreams, you need to keep a few things in mind: 

  • Is it a good size? The room needs enough space for all your equipment and shouldn’t feel crowded or claustrophobic. At the same time, you don’t want it to be too big, as this may take away the intimacy factor. 
  • Does it have what you need? For example, if you’re planning on using wall equipment, make sure the walls are thick enough to add those fixtures. Is the ceiling high enough? Etc. 
  • Is it discreet? Steamy sex can get loud — really fast! You don’t want to get noise complaints. So make sure that your sex dungeon isn’t located right next to the neighbours. Pick a room where no one can hear you, or try to soundproof it as much as possible.

Does it have climate control? Make sure that your room doesn’t get too cold in the winter or too hot in the summer. An easy fix is to install heating or air-conditioning.

example of a room that can be used as a bdsm playroom


2. Plan the space’s interior design

After you’ve chosen the perfect space for your bondage room, you need to start planning what you’d like the interior to look like. This doesn’t only refer to the BDSM furniture and equipment you’ll use but the lighting, floor, wallpaper, and power as well.

  • Choose a theme and colour scheme that adds to the kinkiness. Red, purple, gold, silver, and black are all excellent choices. 
  • Make sure you have lighting in all the right places so you and your partner can see each other throughout the entire play session — making it a hundred times hotter! 
  • Make sure you plan for equipment or tools that need power so that you can place them close to an electrical outlet. 

A great place to look for design inspiration is Pinterest or even Google Images.

BDSM room inspiration on Pinterest feed

3. Buy the right sex dungeon equipment and furniture

It’s finally time to go shopping for your favourite sex equipment, sex tools, and furniture! The equipment, tools, and furniture you choose will depend on your sexual fantasies and the room itself. 

Be conscious of what you buy, though! You don’t want your pleasure dungeon filled with low-quality, cheap stuff. Make sure you look at the quality and buy from well-known, reliable retailers. 

Here are a few ideas of some of the equipment and furniture you can include in your sex room: 

  • Beds and pillows: A bed or a lounger is the most essential piece of furniture for a sex room since it provides a sturdy surface on which you can play. Additionally, you can invest in some sex pillows for different positions, under-mattress restraints that’ll help keep you constrained and ready, and also some waterproof sheets for when things get really hot and wet. 
  • Sex swings and slings: I am a huge fan of Door Jam Slings since they don’t take up much space and require no power tools to install. This means that they’re also great if you’re renting an apartment! All you need to install it is a sturdy door frame. 
  • Spanking benches and BDSM horses: If you’re into spanking and light punishment, you might consider getting a spanking bench or BDSM horse. Both are great for restraining your partner and spanking them from several angles. 
  • Spreader bars: Designed to spread your ankles, legs, or wrists, spreader bars are excellent for creating anticipation and keeping your partner restrained while doing naughty things to them. 
  • Vibrators: A sex room isn’t a sex room without some quality vibrators close by. There are tons of different vibrators for you to choose from — from clit vibrators, dildos, rabbit ears, sex wands, and so much more. 
  • Butt play tools: Butt play can be really fun since the anus is full of sensitive nerve endings. You can explore different butt tools to find something that works for you. Butt plugs, anal vibrators, and anal beads are all excellent choices. 

image of different anal sex toys

This is by no means an exhaustive list. There are loads more sex furniture and toys for you to choose from, such as floggers, nipple clamps, bondage gear, sex machines, and more. It all depends on what you like and want to explore. 

Discover other excellent sex toy options in my Fifty Shades of Grey Sex Toys article.   

4. Set the mood

Sex is all about senses: Smell, taste, feel, sound, and sight — or lack thereof ;). You can make the room your sensual playground by adding different fragrances, textures, music, etc. 

Another excellent way to add to the mood is to consider incorporating a full-length mirror so that you can see your body as you move, while you wear lingerie, while you’re naked — and even while you’re having sex. 

It can help you see yourself as a sexual person, which is powerful if you have any mental disconnect. 

Also, remember to include a lock on your door. Locking the door when you’re ready for some serious vulva attention adds to the excitement and stops you from worrying that your kids will barge in any second. Instead, you’ll be able to focus on all the sensations and intensify your arousal and orgasms. 

5. Remove visual and tech distractions

After you’ve designed your pleasure room, look around and be honest with yourself. Does the environment inspire you? Is there something that needs immediate change? Are things lying around? 

Remove any clutter and anything that could remind you of your daily to-do list — there’ll be plenty of time for that AFTER you’ve had your fun. 

Also, try to make your BDSM room a tech-free zone. Any glowing devices that could distract you need to go. No phone, no laptop, no TV. An exception to the rule is a speaker you can use to play your favourite music. 

Ready for playtime?

Now that you know exactly how to create your own BDSM playroom, it’s time to get to work. By building a dedicated sex room, you’ll have the chance to finally explore your deepest desires — WITHOUT any disturbances or worrying about someone barging in. 

Learn how to have more fun with sex, spice up your sex life, and have more mind-blowing orgasms (whether you’re by yourself or with a partner) by joining the Better in Bed Academy

3 Responses

  1. This is brilliant and so many practical tips. Super inspired to make my room more sexy and sensual. Thanks Lisa you excellent article as always <3

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