Ever wondered how to talk about swinging with your partner? Then this episode is for you!
Tune in to listen to the second part of my conversation with Dee McDonald. Dee is a psychotherapist, relationship counsellor, sexual empowerment coach, researcher, and writer on non-monogamies and recreational sex. She helps couples to negotiate different aspects of their lives, when they’ve hit a block, or when they want to improve or change the direction of their relationship in some way.
Dee has always viewed sex as a holistic experience and finds that the misperception of what sex is, and increasing dependence on genital sex is a common reason many people choose to visit a sex therapist. Dee has published research about swinging and also has her own experience.
How to talk about Swinging
It’s a tricky conversation to start. But, it’s sad to imagine a life without ever broaching the subject if this is something that you are curious about.
Dee encourages deep, curious questioning as an ongoing practice within a relationship. It’s something that couples tend to do when they first get into a relationship but tends to wear away after a while.
- Find one question to ask and dig down – on an almost daily basis.
2. Start talking about fantasies
3. Share ideas that you would like to put into practice – or not put into practice.
Begin by bringing the subject up gently and lightly, being mindful that this may be the first time your partner has considered swinging. This goes for any new sexual activity. Perhaps introduce it as a fantasy, and then perhaps explore swinger websites together after some time.
Consider the experience a collaboration and approach it with curiosity and no solid end goal. That will help both parties to feel the most comfortable.